Tech

Big night tonight, friends. Live it up! Before you cruise over to Chili’s for happy hour, though, take a moment to get your gadget affairs in order by perusing these frequently asked questions.

What’s going to happen?

Either nothing, or something where a lot of people die but there are some survivors left to repopulate civilization, or our souls all collectively shift into the next level of consciousness. We’re rooting for nothing or the soul thing. The second thing is the most work, by far, if you happen to survive it.

Assuming nothing doesn’t happen – either the second or the third thing happens, that is – let’s move on.

Will the Internet work?

Probably not.

Will my cell phone work?

Probably not.

Will faxing work?

Probably, because nothing’s been able to kill the fax machine. It’s like the cockroach of the tech industry.

Will I need any gadgets?

The…

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